how to talk about tgnb people and gender affirming surgeries
Appropriate ways to refer to a TGNB person
Non binary person
Inappropriate ways to refer to a TGNB person
Transgender* *Note: Transgender is an adjective, not a noun
If a trans person uses these terms to refer to themselves, that is absolutely appropriate and the language we use as self-identifiers should not be critiqued. However, for cis people or otherwise people who could not self-identify as one of these labels, it is insensitive and inappropriate to use these terms to refer to trans people collectively.
Talking about gender-affirming surgeries:
Don’t compare trans bodies to cis bodies
Don’t make derogatory comments about pre-, post-, or non-op bodies
Don’t call body parts “male” or “female” parts
A vagina is not a woman’s vagina, it is just a vagina, and so on
Don’t claim one surgeon/surgical team is better than all of the others
Don’t make derogatory comments about certain scars
Ex. “Phalloplasty arm scars look bad.”
Use “I” statements
Ex. “I don’t think I want a scar on my arm”
Don’t assume identity based on anatomy or desired anatomy
Not all people who get vaginoplasty are women, not all people who get phalloplasty are men, etc.
Don’t shame people for getting or not getting certain procedures
Remember: everyone is different. The wants and needs we as trans people have for our bodies vary greatly, and generalizations can be harmful.